Rediscovering Me

I visited an offshore platform this week & what an experience it was! My 1st time on a chopper. I was initially terrified as I hate flying but I enjoyed the ride. It felt a lot more steady than being in plane, even when we flew through clouds. Maybe it's because it flies lower but nontheless, it was fun! And the rig - what a marvellous piece of engineering! Its just so amazing, this huge structure, standing in the middle of the ocean - and it actually looks small when compared with the vastness of the water. And its amazing how they get water, generate their electricity & air-condition the place. I have a new appreciation for the hardships of life on a rig, where there is nothing else to look at but water, when all you can do is work. Poor things! But the food is glorious! The variety is outstanding but considering that life revolves around mealtimes, it has to be so. No danger in gaining weight, given the amount of physical work that they do. Everyone warned me about the m...

When a person makes love, do you notice who you are with, or is just body parts that turn you on? I've had sex with 3 different men: sadly, the experience with my spouse ranks the lowest in terms of 'quality'. And I'm not talking about just orgasms... I think many would agree with me when I say that marital sex is often done out of duty, because you just need to fill that physical need & that is the only person available. We go through the motions with our spouses, we know what works & we just repeat it over & over. Yes, we cum, seemingly satisfied and we go back to being housemates. When I was growing up, in a traditional catholic household, sex was the ultimate giving of oneself: all of me,my body, my thoughts, my feelings. Of course, I have since changed my mind about there being the only one person for us in the whole world (earlier post refers :D) But I've realised that sex with hubby is very often about getting it done. Maybe I'm not being fair...

I am sitting in the lobby of the Awana Kijal Resort - wifi is only available at the F&B outlets - enjoying an Austin Chase mocha (wonders never cease :-)) It is a lovely hotel, very Malaysian architecture. My room faces the beach but when one gets here at 8pm, there's not much to see. I wish I had the time to enjoy the place, absorb the atmosphere - the drive here from Kuantan airport was a feast for eyes, and my soul. Its been quite a while since I've seen traditional kampungs & watched the folk go about their daily to-dos, with the kids having the time of their life playing in the open. But here am I, working in this lovely lobby. I have just cleared 80+ emails that came in since I left the office at 3pm. Worked on a business proposal...It just never stops. On one hand, it feels so 'alive' to have your mind constantly active, thinking, planning ...But if one is always living on another 'plain', where is the life? Constantly working for future thin...