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Making Love - what runs through your head?

When a person makes love, do you notice who you are with, or is just body parts that turn you on?

I've had sex with 3 different men: sadly, the experience with my spouse ranks the lowest in terms of 'quality'. And I'm not talking about just orgasms...

I think many would agree with me when I say that marital sex is often done out of duty, because you just need to fill that physical need & that is the only person available. We go through the motions with our spouses, we know what works & we just repeat it over & over. Yes, we cum, seemingly satisfied and we go back to being housemates.

When I was growing up, in a traditional catholic household, sex was the ultimate giving of oneself: all of me,my body, my thoughts, my feelings. Of course, I have since changed my mind about there being the only one person for us in the whole world (earlier post refers :D)

But I've realised that sex with hubby is very often about getting it done. Maybe I'm not being fair to him when I compare him with the others, but its not about sexual prowess - its about me feeling that the other person is making love to me: my mind, my body, my senses.

That is why I think that kissing is incredibly intimate, lips are on the face - you will have to look at a person when you kiss them, you touch their face - and in that, somehow it acknowledges the person.

I have no illussions about my sexual encounters with other men, its sex - simply that. But when I am able to 'connect' with the person, we chat about ourselves & especially if he looks at me, touches my face, kisses me - that just brings the sex to another level - it feels like the person is making out with me, that I am present in the act.

And that makes it very very nice!

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